penguinfindsnemo
live. laugh. learn. because you have the rest of your life ahead of you.
penguinfindsnemoINSPIRATION. MOTIVATION.
Sometimes I tend to stray away from my true goals in life. All in all, I just want to be happy. But happiness just doesn’t occur overnight. It’s a matter of how you get there rather than wishing it upon yourself. Otherwise, it’s just a journey lost in itself, or hardly a journey at all. As much as I’ve been locking myself in the confines of my room, watching endless episodes of who knows how many different television shows I watch, in order to achieve my goal of inspiring others kinda involves me having the motivation and courage to get myself out of bed and out the front door first.
So from now on, I promise to:
And because I’m a checklist kind of gal, I prefer to do this in steps. Before I know it, I’ll be well on my way towards a happier, more confident me.
I could still be in denial.. I know I’m definitely still stubborn as hell… despite all of the emotional pain that I could potentially be in right now… but I’ve never been in such a calmer state of mind. Though I’m sure anyone else can agree with me that it’s difficult to find someone who has common interests, who finds things as intriguing as you do and is curious about the things that intrigues him, willing to open up his mind to new things despite his set dislikes, challenges you to work harder yet makes you procrastinate simultaneously, always keep your mind at ease even at times when you’re most frustrated with him… the list is endless. But essentially, these were the reasons why I felt it was necessary to keep things going yet avoid confrontation. Why it was necessary to fight for something I truly believed had some future value to, even though I was completely unsure of how whatever we had would ultimately turn out. It was just necessary because it felt right. I just couldn’t explain why. Growing up, I’ve always been taught to fight for things I believed in. However, the battles you choose to fight aren’t always the right battles to fight. BUT! The one thing I have learned is to always follow your heart. Your heart may not know what’s right for you at the moment, but in the end I feel that following your heart will eventually send you on a journey of a lifetime. You’ll regret every step of the way, but you’ll get a journey of stories to share with your grandkids, new acquaintances that’ll become best friends in a couple years, new experiences. Following your heart just makes you a stronger person with each step you take. You shouldn’t stop something short just because you don’t know where it’ll lead. Just follow. And when the time comes to question, just follow your heart, and things will eventually sort themselves out. Maybe. Even though the chances of finding someone else like this is probably one-in-a-million, I guess the only way to get over it is to slowly accept things as they are over time, and just be happy that I’ve made a new friend over it. Not only a new friend, but now one of my better friends, which I’ll take over a lost potential soul mate any day.
I tend to take myself for granted sometimes, especially since I’ve been battling with this gruesome little demon named Low-Self Esteem for so long. It so happens that this year is the Year of the Dragon (I’m a dragon!), the year I FINALLY graduate and get my bachelors, the year I’m one step closer to independence… this is such a huge year for me! I have so much to prove, not only to myself, but to my parents, to the grad schools I applied, to everyone else who’s doubted me. I need to show everyone that I’m entirely capable of doing the things I dream of doing, ignoring all the negativity I get on a daily basis. Having that said, this semester will go quickly and slowly all at the same time, but it will be so worth it come commencement in June. So just because I’ve lost one battle doesn’t mean I’ve lost it all. There’s so much more to fight for.
But like most girls, I don’t like uncertainty. I’d like to know where I’ll be going to grad school in the fall, where I’ll be working as a biomedical engineer, if I’ll actually enjoy working as a biomedical engineer, if there’s actually someone out there for me. But then again, what’s the point of living life if you’re taking the easy way out? Despite my stubbornness and willingness to fight, I’m afraid of taking risks, afraid of opening myself up to people again, afraid to speak up when I need to… I’ve never been as scared as I am right now, handling this ginormous fireball of uncertainty. That’s probably why I’m so calm right now… yeah…
— Dr. Seuss, Horton Hears a Who!
2012.
Be glad that you’re still alive and kickin’.
Realize that you’re better than you actually think you are.
Be more realistic.
Be inspired to inspire others.
But remember to love yourself first before you love others.
As people say, “All good things must come to an end.” What I’ve learned from the past is to never regret, and that things ahead could only get better. Although it feels as if I’m still stepping into shark-infested waters, albeit alone, I know that everything is going to be okay.
Paper crunchin’ time!
I’m finally starting to appreciate the good things in life. I’m spending this summer with some pretty amazing people, and I’ll be sure to spend every last second with them before they’re all gone. Otherwise, it’ll be over before you know it.
This will be the best July yet! <3
14 Not So Basic Facts About You
What the… I practically did that yesterday!
1. I watch too many TV shows.
2. I can’t take a shower without the radio on.
3. I’m a sucker for supermarkets and office supply stores.
4. I’ve donated my hair twice! Maybe again this year…
5. Coffee gives me tummy aches :(
6. I’d like to learn how to Irish step dance one day.
7. I bark in response to particular ring tones.
8. I have a habit of not getting my priorities straight, especially when it comes to putting others before me.
9. Sometimes I talk too much! Other times I talk too little. I wish I could be a bit more proactive at times.
10. FPS games make me nauseous.
11. My comfort foods include: sweet potato fries, grilled cheese sandwiches and mini maki from Teriyaki Boy.
12. If you ever look through my pencil case, you’ll find about 50 pens and only a single pencil.
13. I’d like to have a real life Mario Kart game someday.
14. I feel like there’s a lot I still don’t know about myself!
15 Basic Facts About You
1. I’m under 5 feet!
2. I’m Asian.
3. I always like to keep myself busy, then I find myself drowned in too many things. I guess as my professor calls me, I’m “intellectually curious”?
4. I love cake decorating and would like to open up a cake shop one day. I’m actually teaching a class this summer with the best cousin in the world, Lauren!!
5. I tend to feed off of other people’s energies and am surrounded some pretty amazing friends at the moment!
6. I like to knit. I tend to start a lot of knitting projects, then take FOREVER to finish them. Example: hooded sweater I started practically THREE years ago. Still not done.
7. I’m an amateur singer/ songwriter and I play the guitar and piano. I’m terribly afraid of performing in front of crowds but I’ve played at a few open mics in the last two years. My hands still get incredibly cold when I play, even when it’s in front of 4-5 people.
8. My life is practically run by to-do lists. Sometimes too many lists… Actually, I spend way too much time writing these lists that I just don’t get things done sometimes. This seems to be a problem… I also open wayyy too many tabs when I web-browse.
9. I love food. I’m fond of looking at menus and trying out new cuisines.
10. Have I mentioned that I do too many things? Other things I’m fond of: kayaking, frisbee and rock climbing. I also really miss ballroom dancing, parkour and CTF!
11. I love penguins! And dinosaurs.
12. I doubt myself a lot. I have pretty bad self-esteem issues. This definitely doesn’t help when you’re a female in a male-dominated field of discipline. Welcome to the world of engineering.
13. I really wish I could travel more!
14. I watch too many TV shows.
15. I like nachos? http://welikenachos.tumblr.com/
